First, I haven’t found a new job yet, which is worrying me very much. I can’t stand it much longer, I’m so close to just walking out. Second, as everyone knows now, I’m getting married on October 20th!!! I’m super excited about it. I can’t wait to start a life and family with J, like everyone knows we’ve been trying for months. Well the thing is, I think I might be now. I don’t want to be pregnant at our wedding, obviously I’m not going to do anything, I want the baby, just hope I’m wrong about possibly being pregnant right now.
I don’t know why I’m thinking about this so much right now. It’s just seems a lot like the time I was pregnant. Yesterday I ate an entire medium pizza by myself in less than an hour with absolutely no problem, I’m peeing like crazy, I’ve gained a lot of weight fast, my breast have gotten bigger.
J seems excited about the thought of me being pregnant, he keeps putting his hands on my tummy and making comments about the changes that make it seem like I’m pregnant. I just don’t want to be big when I get married, plus I don’t really want people to think I got married because I’m pregnant. I mean it doesn’t really matter what people think of us, but I just really want it to be perfect. I didn’t really imagine being pregnant when I get married, I assumed we would have a baby before getting married or after getting married.